I’m not sure if this item was supposed to be listed under the XXX section, but the auctioneer is offering this item as a legitimate patent to be purchased for one million dollars. These featured prototype cell phones reproduce physical kisses. A detector in the phone records lip pressure, percussion speed and sucking force.

These values are then transmitted and reproduced on the other phone through an elastomer mouth. I’m sure future models will enable the user to select custom mouth designs, such as Debbie’s; the classy gal who toured Dallas.

Click through if you know of someone who wants to kiss their phone.