This is one spike gun that would get your projects done quickly around the house! This is an actual prop used in Saw 4. This spike gun was used to kill the photographer in the gruesome classroom trap crime scene. This item comes with a certificate of authenticity as well.

Even if this spike gun wasn’t from a movie, it’d still be awesome to own. Whether you want a way to scare your kids into good behavior or are having trouble getting rid of an x-hubby, this thing rocks! 

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This handy item may change the strong stigma of scratching one’s undercarriage in public — a classy..umm..tennis ball scratcher. It even features a female-style hand, so homophobic guys can scratch with total comfort.

Honestly, this thing’s pretty funny, making for a great gag gift. On the other hand, with enough prominent support, it could very well change public opinion towards a man’s need to “adjust” throughout the day.

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David Blaine is solely responsible for making magic cool again. Not since David Copperfield have we seen things as cool as what this guy pulls out of his hat. Actually, I don’t think he’s done a single act involving a top hat, so that right there is cool.

This is a step-by-by step guide that will supposedly teach you awesome tricks, such as Fly Resurrection, Coin Bite and Restored Coin, Card in Bottle and Voodoo Ash. If this guy’s cool enough to entertain thousands on TV, then you’ve got a good chance of picking up at least one cool trick.

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Here’s your chance to buy into Microsoft Corp. for a measly few bucks – a beautiful poster of Mr. Bill Gates! Okay, you really can bid on Gates, but the real point of this post is to highlight Microsoft’s offer to acquire Yahoo Inc. for $44.6 billion. That kind of a number makes me reminisce about an Austin Powers scene: “one trillion kajillion doooollars.”

Microsoft’s Chief Executive Officer Steve Ballmer wrote the following in a letter to Yahoo’s board of directors: ”…can offer an increasingly exciting set of solutions for consumers, publishers and advertisers.” Aw, what a nice guy. I’m sure he hasn’t even thought of the fact that his income will quadruple. And I’m quite sure he’s supporting this acquisition in the name of philanthropy. Treat the John Q. Public with a littel decency and talk about some truths instead of just the PR sugar. And won’t this bring on some monopoly issues?

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Learn how to make over $60,000 a year in recycling used cell phones by bidding $25! Enter Buyer’s Clue #40,469: Beware of sales copy that ends in an exclamation point or is in ALL CAPS — it usually means the seller is all hype and no value. The product should sell itself, not the punctuation!!!!!!!!! I don’t mean to bash this particular auctioneer at all, they may actually be able to offer valid information for making a business out of recycling cell phones, I just mean to help you all become savvy bidders with a hint here or there.

But you can use such auction items as ways to funnel your searches, creating a more finite idea of what you’re actually looking for or causing you to realize other potential business opportunities. Searching through these auction items can be looked as idea hunting. So even if that particular item doesn’t float your boat, search around and something may spark a genius idea within you.

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Combining a bit of art with practicality is this Chinese clock. It actually looks pretty cool. Clocks are one of those things you’ve got to have, so why not get one that that’s actually nice to look at? It possesses an air of creativity and antique aesthetics.

This is an auction item, which helps explain why the bidding starts at less than a $1, but beware of such inexpensive items — they may not always work, or they’ll make up for the low bid amount by jacking up the shipping costs.   

Click through and bid on a fine 1921 era Chinese clock.

Where the hell did the Giants come from? And don’t say New York. These guys were up and down almost all season and got waxed by a few teams that simply shouldn’t have been able to pull one off on them. And now, just a few weeks ago, they managed to crank up the score against the Pats and finish just a field goal behind them!

When Eli Manning managed to put the classic Favre down to sleep, the Patriots should have shuddered a little, remembering that anything can happen on any given Sunday.

Click through and bid on a New York Giants Eli Manning jersey.  

Okay, one minor infraction during preseason and a perfect season have everyone but the New England area hating the Pats. What’s up with that? Is it America’s deep-rooted pride of the underdog that has us lambasting these grid-iron greats? I should hope not. Look at their name — NEW ENGLAND, not Old England. Looking at it from a Revolutionary War point of view, this area above many represents the triumph of the underdog.

What is it then that makes people loathe them so? Is it because Moss is thought of as a no-good gangster, or the fact that Brady looks like a sissy and is still trouncing defenses left and right? At heart, I’m a Bills fan, so when I say this, keep in mind I’m not biased: Get over yourselves and hail the inevitable champs.

Click through and bid on a New England Tom Brady Patriots jersey.

Starting off at a hefty, but worth it, $7,500 opening bid, is this fine 1983-84 Cal Ripken bat; personally signed.  This bat has some awesome ball stitch and cleat marks, showing that the Iron Man actually used it in play.

Raising the value of this bat is the fact that the Orioles were World Series Champs the same year as this bat’s inception and Cal was named AL MVP!

Click through and bid one of baseball’s best.

Here we have one of the most classic gag gifts of all time, the WeePee, or pulls-his-pants-down-and-pisses…whatever you call this thing. Although not quite on the same plateau as farting, pissing can usually be relied upon for a few good laughs with the right applications. For example, one of the auctioneer’s suggested uses for this was to use it as a drink mixer.

Interesting cultural note: the Manneken Pis in Brussels, Belgium is an actual statue of a little boy pissing near the Grand Place (the main square in Brussels). This statue is rated as one of the top sights to see there and is probably the inspiration for all pissing gag gifts.

Click through and bid on some classic pissing.  

Just how many people can you impress with an 8-track? Maybe one out of a million, but for that one extra special individual who is wowed by retro technology, and will only get in a car that produces the static magic of an 8-track, well, this could be your winning ticket.

For just $8, this vintage RCA Vibra Mark 8 Stereo 8-Track player can get you groovin’ again to the golden oldies that have been trapped in your 8-track cassettes. Besides, how can you go wrong with walnut grain?

Click through and fire up the 80’s.

The major parties have delivered a winner a piece in two major early primary states, paving an interesting road to Super Tuesday in February. Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton’s (D-N.Y.) recent comeback victory has us wondering just how much of a nut cracker she’ll shape up to be. I am, of course, speaking of this auction’s item – an actual Hillary Rodham Clinton nut cracker.

Click through and bid on an item for the first potential husband and wife White House double-team.